Prince George

Goodbye, Prince George, I said and left on a plane to Vancouver. HOW DO YOU LIKE ME NOW?

Vancouver

Hey Vancouver, you look nice. Oh, I forgot, you suck. I´m going to Victoria instead.

Victoria

Hey Victoria, you look nice, you were more fun than Vancouver! Also, if anyone is interested The Irish Times plays the exact same shit as EVERY cover band at EVERY bar in Halifax. Check it out, they have deals on Guiness on Thursdays.

Vancouver Again

No time to chat! Got a plane to catch!

Seattle

Window seat baby. Hey. My airplane landed in a mall... with a roller coaster?

Atlanta

My seat is in the middle, damnit. 5.5 hours between two 50 year old sweat dudes, I bet. Hey, there is a hot girl waiting for the same plane, I hope she´s the one I get to sit beside. Oh better not talk to her, THAT would be WEIRD. Oh look, another hot girl. Better not talk to here either, oh shit, eye contact, running away. Oh look I´m like the last person to board the plane, I wonder who I´m sitting in between. Oh... look. It´s the hot girl. Oh, and the other hot girl is in the window seat. Better not talk to them, that would be WEIRD.

Okay. I´ll just read my book, between these two hot girls. I´m kind of tired, maybe I´ll just go to sleep so I don´t have to talk to anyone. Brilliant thinking, Ross.

*yawn* that was a nice nap, and how nice, they gave me a pillo... oh shit. That´s a hot girls shoulder. Okay. Play it cool. She PROBABLY didn´t notice. I know, read your book, she won´t suspect a thing.

How slick am I, Ross? Super slick, buddy!

Quito

Isle seat baby. Stay awake the whole time. Awesome plan from an awesome dude. Quito customs? A BREEZE! Meet Xavier (pronounced have-e-are) at the airport? CHECK. Get dropped off at house and not having a damned clue what ANYBODY is saying? CHECK. Alright, I got this. BEDTIME.

OH WAIT. It´s a li´l cozzie in here, let´s open a window! Hmm... window appears to be open. Oh well. Sleep time. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Day 1

Wake up 500h local time. Meet up with Jorge (not pronounced George) hang out downtown a little bit. Get travels checks rejected AFTER signing them. Thanks American Express. Super helpful.

Meet a German at the volunteer house. Meet a different german at the volunteer house. Meet a different german at the spanish school. Meet another german at the spanish school. Meet an american at the Spanish school. Meet yet another german at the spanish school. Meet a Canadian at the Spanish school. Weird.

Late afternoon nap. Scratch scratch at the door as a key is used on the outside and BOOM! A german enters my room speaking spanish.

Well shit.

Time to change rooms.

Move to new house next door with two beds. OOOOOOoooo! A roommate! Study spanish Ross, awesome idea buddy.

Late night. Oh hello fellow human being entering this fine double room.

Hola!

This human turns out to be Ricardo, a bus driver for Gulliver´s Travels. Not kidding.

Ross inherits one sugar cane sweet candy treat from Ricardo!

Ross passes out. 

Day 2

Induction at 900h, gotta get up and SHINE THOSE SHOES. Eat more of the awesome milk and cereal or as is common in Ecuador the famous yoghurt and flax seed. Nom nom nom nom nom.